The Nation’s Enemy Number One.

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The Nation’s Enemy Number One.

Mumbai, Khulgayipoll News Desk, May 3, 2010

It is a proud day for the country today. The courts of justice have finally delivered their verdict. Finally truth has won, injustice and lies have been vanquished. It is being hailed as the victory of the people of India. The number one enemy of the nation Khatmal Pasab has been found guilty for the worst ever terrorist attacks which happened in the economic capital, Mumbai, two years ago and the court has sentenced him to death.

The government has been very angry about the attacks since it had once again proved that the country’s Intelligence system, had no intelligence at all. Hence the government wanted that the perpetrators be sent to the gallows as soon as possible. And now they have made sure that justice has been done. The court today passed the verdict declaring that the number one enemy of India Khatmal Pasab should be hanged till death.

On this great day our correspondents caught up with some of nation’s well wishers to get their priceless comments.

Our correspondent Ragda Patties met Bagh Fakade, at his residence, he refused to speak in Hindi or English but this is what he said and we translate:

“It is a great day for the common man of Mumbai (an assistant whispered “Sir Maharashtra”) and Maharashtra that this devil has been brought to justice. And on this auspicious day we declare that we will start a new revolution. We will ask all the television channels broadcasting on each and every television set in Mumbai (assistant from behind again “Sir and Maharashtra”) and Maharashtra should have their logos and names displayed in Marathi only. That is our tribute to the victory of the common man of Maharashtra (assistant from behind again “Sir Maharashtra”, Fakade turns around and gives him a ‘tichyaaila’ type look). I will request everyone to start the revolution from today itself. Jai Shivaji, Jai Maharashtra.”

Our correspondent Pehle Aap Mishra caught up with Behenji Kalawati out side a statue shop in Lucknow, and this is what she said:

“Pasab is a black mark on this nation. He is the enemy number one of this country and I am happy that the court has delivered the justice. It is a big day for all the Dalits and other backward casts of India. To celebrate this victory of the neglected lower casts of the country not only are we declaring it as a public holiday in our state but I have also ordered 1000 life size bronze statues of myself to be made and placed all over, to make our beloved state more beautiful .”

Our correspondent Sattu Jha from Patna met Baaloo ji who was shopping for some Rabri (a sweet meat made of milk and sugar) with his wife Dhibri Devi and this is their reaction:

“I have heard the news and I think this is a very good verdict in favor of the minority community. I think that the government should have CBI investigate the whole Pasab case again, instead of wasting its time in trying to find out which brand of cattle feed I use for my buffaloes. I am going to ask the government to start the family planning program again to celebrate this verdict.”

Our correspondents spoke to the minister of Twitter affairs Mr Haanchee Suroor but he said, “You will have to follow me on Twitter to read my comments regarding the verdict.” Our correspondent is following him on Twitter now.

Our Mumbai correspondent Ragda Patties also caught up with the Bollywood super star Sukh Dukh Kaand for his reactions:

“I am very happy today that now even the Indian court agrees with me, that every terrorist is not a Kaand. If Pasab is willing to change his ways I am ready to teach him acting so that he may act in one of my movies and fulfill the mission that he came for or if he wants I can ask my Dadaji to teach him cricket so that he may join my cricket team. Because you know I am the star, I am the best and my movies are the best… ” Our correspondent had to snatch the microphone away from him.

Our correspondent Koyla Gundi found the missing ex-chief minister Gadhoo Roda coming out of a seven star spa in Mauritius and asked him what he thought about the verdict.

“Dekhiye hum toh gareeb kisaan hain. Humare babuji koyla khadaan mein kaam karte thein. Humare paas toh chawal khareedne ke bhi paise nahi hain. Toh Newspaper khareed kar yeh sab cheez kaha se padhenge. Humein toh Pasab ka ek hi matlab pata tha (raises the pinky on his right hand). Humein jhoothe aaropon mein fasaya gaya hai.” (I am a poor farmer. My father used to work in coal fields. We don’t even have the money to buy rice then how do you think we will buy newspaper and read about these things. The only meaning of Pasab we know is (raises the pinky on his right hand). I am being falsely framed.)

Our correspondent Gend Ball Gilli asked the tycoon who has changed the face of Indian cricket Mr. KhitKhit Godi, but he was in a hurry because his chartered plane was waiting and we could only catch him saying:

“I am still the chairman of…”

These are some of the reactions that our correspondents have collected from the well wishers of our country. We have also received reactions from Gayapapita, Churnanidhi, Moyaamji, Marmar Jhing, Garda Pahar and hundreds of others from all walks of life who have dedicated their lives in the upliftment of the poor of the nation. They have all hailed the verdict of hanging the number one enemy of our country.